Do you have the time

To soak your beans in brine?

Or are you opening a can

Cause you’re in a hurry?

I am one of those

Tasty bean eating fools

Chomping on some beans

No doubt about it

Sometimes I give myself some treats

Sometimes the beans go into me

It all keeps adding up

On beans I’m fillin’ up

Am I just full beans?

Or am I just stoned?

I went to a shrink

To analyze my beans

She said not to see her anymore

I went to a store

I was out of beans and needed more

So I bought a bunch of them

It was pretty rad

    • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.netOP
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      14 days ago

      I pledge

      A bean dip

      To the underworld

      I heard that Satan likes

      A chickpea black bean swirl

      A face in the crowd

      Suggested guacamole

      Without a doubt

      Mispronounced

      But still a good call

  • Dirt_Owl [comrade/them, they/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    14 days ago

    Do you have the time

    To listen to me dine

    On lots of beans and nothing else

    I am was of those those

    Sad malnorish fools

    Now better off on beans no doubt about it

    Sometimes beans give myself the shits

    Sometimes my farts creep up on me

    It all keeps adding up

    I think I ate enough

    My bowls have been destroyed

    Uh huh ya ya

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.netOP
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    14 days ago

    Dear mother can you hear me cooking?

    It’s been 3 bean salad since I have left your home

    This poverty has got me eating

    Delicious beans now that I’m out and on my own

    And eating beans alone

    Pay attention to the split peas

    They taste good with rhizomes

    I boil it up and it tastes nice

    I wanna feed you soup

    That I made inside my home

    Welcome to beans and rice

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.netOP
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    Bean dip

    Chomp inside myself

    My own best friend

    My most trusted enemy

    I farted

    And departed

    Never telling anyone that it was me

    I must insist on being

    A bean enthusiast

    A burrito leading to a gassy behind

    Refrying

    Soaking and drying

    I’ve perfected the science of the beaniot

    Slow witted

    But committed

    To a bean lifestyle

    Even if it’s deviant

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.netOP
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    Nice beans finish fast

    I’m getting lots of gas

    I’m eating beans and shidding my behind

    Rich and flavorful

    I’m filling up my bowl

    Beans and I are eternally entwined

    Pressure cooker bakes my beans

    And smelling me is disease

    I’m so fucking stinky

    People cry

    Every bean my have it’s truth

    But every bean’s in you

    Never knew you were such a smelly guy

    OHHHH Nice beans finish fast

    Cause fiber helps you pass

    So you don’t have to shid your ass

    For as much time

    Farting on command

    Making people smell your hand

    Your losing most of your friend’s trust

    Smelling how you please

    Bite the hand with beans

    You’re gonna eat some beans

    And that is rad

    • dat_math [they/them]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      14 days ago

      Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean

      Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean Bean

  • GalaxyBrain [they/them]@hexbear.netOP
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    4
    ·
    14 days ago

    Here we go again

    Infatuation with my beans

    That I’ve just made can’t end

    Oh but then again

    If you can’t smell much more than beans

    Then that’s exactly when I’m cooking

    I toss and turn all night thinking

    About bean perfection

    Only to realize that

    It’s not different at all

    So I throw my past bean-stakes

    And contemplate my future

    That’s when I say

    'What the hey?"

    I’ll eat beans forever

    Me and beans together run away yeah

    Far away

    (First 5 greenday albums slap hard, Dookie is their 3rd, btw)

  • dat_math [they/them]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    edit-2
    14 days ago

    DAH DAH DAH

    I’m the son of fabaceae

    The beanis of suburbia, the legume of none of the above on a steady diet of:

    DAH DAH DAH

    Nitrates and urea and

    compost and manure and all the nitrogen and the co2 that is in the atmospheeere

    and there’s nothing wrong with me

    this is how I’m supposed to beeeeaaaaaaaaaan

    in a land of cereal grains that don’t believe in beanis