Wtf lol

  • DiscoPosting [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    de-perception (SIGHT) — You can’t make out much beyond colors and blob-like shapes bleeding into one another, like a drawing in a child’s coloring book. Astigmatic lights sparkle around you.

    de-suggestion [Trivial: Failure] — No, wait…this might be working. Everything that was once blurry is slowly, slowly starting to come in to view, as though someone is adjusting the focus dial on your retinas. If you cross your eyes just a bit, the images seem as though they fade into one another. It’s beautiful. Your vision works without assistance. At the very least, this is how it ought to work. Keep the glasses off, and you’ll eventually be healed.

    dubois-depressed — Are you sure? I don’t think I can see anything.

    de-suggestion — About 96% of the people who complete this Masterclass can see just fine. Didn’t you pay attention to the testimonials? Maybe you’re doing it wrong. The instructor did give you that sample week to follow. Daily application of Immortelle® oils, epsom salt and zendocrine foot baths, beef liver and organ capsules; if you quit before you try them, how can you say it didn’t work?

    de-endurance — Beef liver and organ capsules naturally increase T-levels and SHBG. Good for curing soft men. This wöman might know what she’s talking about…

    New task: Finish your Masterclass homework

  • privatized_sun [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    this is the logical end result of neoliberalism: “Biden doesn’t need to give you healthcare, just watch Ted Lasso and say twenty hail Marys about mindfulness. Self care is revolutionary, radical act”. These grifters are like bugs feasting on a dying plant

  • Dolores [love/loves]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    i suppose it’s a case of recuperation more than anything else, but whenever woo heads trot out ‘holistic’ i can’t help but be a little credulous and like “yes! we can massively improve health outcomes by addressing social & environmental issues that effect everyone!” letting kids stay outdoors more & giving them free healthcare results in fewer people needing glasses!

    but they actually mean like body-spirits & oils or crystals that have nothing to do with the medical problem somehow curing it cause holistic

    • Infamousblt [any]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      This is definitely true. I know that when I put sunglasses on I completely forget the sun exists, so I don’t wear sunscreen or limit my time in direct sun. In fact I would say the human propensity to completely forget that the sun exists every time they put on sunglasses is the number one cause of skin cancer. Sunglasses are a menace that must be purged from society so we can return to our roots of remembering and worshipping the sun praise-it

      • pezhore@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        No you fool! Sunglasses make other people get sunburned because your lenses focus the suns toxic rays directly on to people you stare at, causing them to get skin cancer.

        Luckily if you burn them, you can then have an “in” to tell them all about these anti-cancer essential oils! Win, win!

    • Runcible [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      wearing them (sunglasses) makes us sunburn more… snow blindness is a thing.

      This is blocked by sunglasses? It’s been awhile since I had glasses but UV protective coatings were pretty common & accessible for corrective lenses as well as I recall.

    • charlie [any, any]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      glasses are a barrier between us and others. not stated, but contact lenses are too.

      So are clothes and that’s why I’m a nudist /s

    • sammer510 [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      glasses are a barrier between us and others

      Yeah so are the air molecules in between us dipshit, how is that any kind of point? What the fuck are you smoking

    • BountifulEggnog [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      glasses are a barrier between us and others. not stated, but contact lenses are too.

      I genuinely want to know what you mean by this. Without my glasses I can’t make out people’s faces and know what they look like. That seems like a way bigger barrier.