• I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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    3 months ago
    1. c. If you are not sure how evil this “holiday” is:

    i. Talk to John Ramirez: ex - Top warlock of NYC

    If he’s a honest to god tchutchulhu warlock that does real magic, I will talk to him and ask to be an apprentice :D

    ii. Talk to the Police. All the WICKEDNESS!

    I don’t think The Police will reply back, they’re probably busy with a tour.

    iii. Increase: murder, child abuse, worship of satan!

    Uh, I guess I can do those, but you really should’ve asked with a “pretty please”.

    • nickiwest@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      From John Ramirez’ website:

      John Ramirez is one of those miracles with a transformed life through the finished work of the cross. He recounts his former life of being trained as a high-ranking devil worshipper warlock for 25 years of his life. He lived in the dark side in the highest realms of the demonic, specifically Santeria, Spiritualism and Palo Mayombe. In 1999, John passed away in his apartment in the Bronx, went to hell and met the devil and the cross of Jesus Christ. He was put back in his body the same night and became a born-again believer. He overcame the Kingdom of Darkness and has spent the latter part of his life being a fierce warrior for Jesus, uncompromised, preaching the gospel to the nations and setting the captives free.

      Yup. Sounds like a reliable, unbiased source.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        Anybody want the explain to him that if you’re serious about spiritualism you either don’t call it that or call it American spiritualism. If someone tells me they’re a spiritualist I assume they mean they’re generally agnostic but incorporate a few aspects of spirituality in their world view, not that they’re out there performing seances

      • Furbag@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        In 1999, John passed away in his apartment in the Bronx, went to hell and met the devil and the cross of Jesus Christ.

        Is… is the cross a sentient being that can speak? I’m a little behind with my Christian Mythology, but why would the cross be in hell along with the devil? Wouldn’t that imply that Jesus went to hell along with it? Am I missing the metaphor?

        Things like this make me wonder how many mental illness issues are swept under the rug because they tend to take the form of some mainstream religious belief and not correctly identified as a psychotic episode because it’s not polite to challenge somebody’s faith even if what they believe is patently ridiculous.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOP
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      3 months ago

      I don’t think The Police will reply back, they’re probably busy with a tour.

      They could reply with a message in a bottle…