• MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I used to beg for money. I was a homeless heroin addict. I learned some interesting stuff begging for money. Being white myself. When I asked white people for money they would often look at me with disdain. Ask black people and they’d usually help ya out. It always seemed crazy to me that the white guy with a suit would treat you like garbage, but the black guy with gang tattoos on his his face and a car that needs work would throw ya a couple of bucks. I’ve heard black people say it works the other way around for them, but I had no way to test it heh.

    I’m completely opiate free now for better or for worse. I say it like that because I suffer from crippling depression. Life is not enjoyable to me anymore. But, there are a lot of homeless guys where I live. I give them money, and blankets in the winter. Honestly, I give zero shits what they spend that money on. I don’t care if it’s drugs, alcohol, toothpaste, or socks. The money, once it leaves my hand is theirs to do with as they please. As long as that money brings them even a moment of happiness. As long as I make their life a little more bearable. I’m fine with that.

    • Smokeydope@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Consider growing some magic mushrooms to help enjoy life again. Good on you for crawling out of that spiral.

      • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You know what? I did grow some and did the whole micro-dose thing. I loved it. But, it made my migraines more frequent. I’m currently working on the migraines with the local charity hospital. So, I want to give it another try soon.

        As a matter of fact. I have 3 Petri dishes with mycelium right now that need grain.

    • afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      heard black people say it works the other way around for them, but I had no way to test it heh.

      I can think of one way you can attempt to test it but I really really do not recommend it. If you do however please later on claim on Twatter that it was a social experiment that got misinterpreted.

    • Enma Ai@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Exactly! Even if they spend it on drugs, what’s the problem? Let them have their moment of relief/happiness.

      As an ex opiate addict myself, maybe I can relate to them too well for most people to understand. Also, what are they to do with 5 dollars if they aren’t hungry and have everything else they need at the moment?

      • vivadanang
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        1 year ago

        my biggest concern with the skyrocketing opiate deaths is: if I go into the store and draw cash just because I feel real bad for this person, are they going to turn that $10 into the hit that kills them.

        fentanyl is killing people like crazy, all over the place. I’d give them a joint or a beer, but the rare times I deal with cash for that uncertainty?

    • prole@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      Are those reports of people panhandling and walking home with a few hundred bucks a day at all accurate? Always seemed kind of like bullshit propaganda to me. I’m sure location matters quite a bit.

      • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        The world is a huge place and people suck. I’m sure it happens. But, in most places it’s hard to accomplish that. Here, if you’re spotted begging by the cops they’ll run you off, or arrest you.

        Here we have laws that keep people from begging on the side of the road. So, that leaves gas stations. Gas stations are usually ok with it for a little while. There is an etiquette to it. Like, only ask people AFTER they go in and get what they need, and don’t go to the same spot more than like once a week. Don’t be there all day. Get what you need and leave. Bonus points if you can buy something from the gas station before you leave.

        I personally only did it as the very last resort. It’s humiliating and you always have a chance of seeing someone you went to school with.

      • SokathHisEyesOpen@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        A couple of decades ago I gave a dollar to a guy begging in front of a grocery store. When I was leaving I overheard him telling the security guard that he’s taking his family on vacation next week so he won’t be around. Then I watched him walk all the way to the very furthest spot in the parking lot, get into a brand new van, and drive away. I was pretty pissed off because I was poor myself and a dollar meant a lot to me. This dude was taking from poor people by acting poorer, when he actually had enough money to own a brand new van and take his family on vacation.

      • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        It’s out there, it exists. My coworker experienced it firsthand same guy tried begging off him three times. “Needs food”…wouldn’t take food, only wanted money. “Needs gas for car”…won’t take the gas in a gas can, only wants the money. So he can totally do it himself.

        He said he called the cops & threatened to beat the shit out of him if he tried to run. The cops were aware of the situation. Says the wife “drops him off” in front of a store, business, gas station, whatever every day so he can “work” / beg for money.

        Pretty sad because he should have a real goddamned job, he’s basically stealing from people, he delegitimizes actual people in need/is basically stealing from them too, and yeah even the wife is in on it.

    • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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      1 year ago

      I’m one of those guys who don’t give to beggars because I prefer to give through non-profits, which I do monthly. I prefer this anonymous kind of donation. I probably give more than those people who sometimes through a few dollars. So please consider this possibility too when you judge those people.

      • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        So, please please please don’t think that I’m poo pooing your choice. All help is valid and appreciated. But, a lot of those charities have overhead that they have to pay for. I can honestly say that in my over 10 years of being an addict and homeless. I may have received help from a charity like 5 times, and every time it was like toothpaste and socks. Which is better than nothing. But that’s why I choose to give the way I do. Just be sure to research who you’re giving money to if it’s a charity.

        Also, and this is me personally. I never judged someone for not giving money. I only judged the way that they looked at me. Those micro aggressions that say things like pity, disgust, or even I’m so sorry, or I wish I could help without saying a word. If I asked and someone said I just don’t have it to give. That was totally fine. Hell, I don’t always have it to give. After all, we have to take care of ourselves first. Otherwise we can never help those in need.

        • vivadanang
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          1 year ago

          was discussing this the other day with a person asking for help; I don’t know they were homeless but assume the situation and their state I’d highly doubt they had anything. The problem is that I get paid electronically and pay for damn near everything electronically and only touch cash every other month if that, and usually have to pay a fee to get cash.

          I’d buy them a meal, hell, I’ll even buy a beer for some of the people I see frequently going in to the quicky mart, but I don’t cash. I also try to do my puny ‘philanthropy’ via community service and direct donations to planned parenthood (they will always get whatever rare few bucks I can spare).

          a cashless economy is putting an even larger hit on these folk I imagine.

        • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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          1 year ago

          Yes, any organisation has overhead that grows with its size. But it is also necessary to help on a bigger scale and have more impact, for example by being able to open a restaurant for the homeless and reducing costs by buying and cooking in bulk. Also I’m in the EU so charities are probably better regulated than in the USA, they get government labels to allow for tax reduction so you know there’s some public utility control.

          I’m not against judging, that’s natural, people who pretend not to, lie. I just wanted to add this idea to refine the judgement.

          • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Oh, yeah that makes sense. Yeah, here in the states a whole lot of charities (even big ones) are little more than scams. It sucks because a lot of money goes into those charities and not a lot of that money is spent helping. Also, the US is HUGE. So, you might live in Alabama, and donate to a charity. But that charity mainly works in places like New York, and San Francisco, and Los Angeles all of which are several days drive from Alabama. So, if someone wants to help in the states, but go through a charity. I suggest volunteering time at a local place, or something like that. Otherwise, there is no way to tell where you’re money went, and there is very little accountability.

      • MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I have, but it’s more complicated than that. Everyone, had abandoned me, and I was homeless. Then, one night at a liquor store I ran into an ex of mine and her girlfriend. My ex and I talked for a while and went our separate ways. She called me a couple of weeks later and she had broken up with her partner and asked me out.

        While on our date she said that if I was serious about getting clean I could live with her and she’d pay for my methadone. I took her up on that deal.

        Things were going great. I started my own business. She has her own business. She got pregnant and we found out it was going to be a boy. 9 months later she gave birth.

        Our son wasn’t even a year old and we realized something was wrong. At first we thought he was deaf, but after taking him to several doctors we found out that he is severely autistic. Like, on disability for the rest of his life autistic.

        My partner had the more established business, and our son required/requires so much attention that I had to give up my business. I am his full time caregiver now. Plus my partner said that she didn’t want to deal with all the appointments and stuff.

        TLDR I owe this woman my life. If I left her now… Well, it’s just not an option, and our livelihood depends on us being where we are. Also, I refer to her as my partner because not only are we not married. I’m actually married to someone else even though I haven’t seen her in 13 years.

      • PeWu@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        Yes, out of this world if that’s what you mean.

      • vivadanang
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        1 year ago

        praytell where do you live that has avoided homelessness and drug addiction?

  • Dippy@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    “ This homeless guy asked me for money the other day. I was about to give it to him and then i thought he was going to use it on drugs or alcohol. And then i thought, that’s what i’m going to use it on. Why am i judging this poor bastard. People love to judge homeless guys. like if you give them money they’re just going to waste it. Well, he lives in a box, what do you want him to do? save it up and buy a wall unit? Take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a cd rack? he’s homeless.”

    • Greg Giraldo
    • randomsnark@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      There’s a similar story about CS Lewis that’s much older. I originally saw it in some print source, but this (unsourced) quick Google copy-paste gives the gist:

      One day, Lewis and a friend were walking down the road and came upon a street person who reached out to them for help. While his friend kept walking, Lewis stopped and proceeded to empty his wallet. When they resumed their journey, his friend asked, “What are you doing giving him your money like that? Don’t you know he’s just going to go squander all that on ale?” Lewis paused and replied, “That’s all I was going to do with it.”

      Obviously it’s funnier when a comedian says it, just thought it was interesting that the general idea has been around for a while. Probably as long as there’s been booze and beggars tbh.

      • LemmysMum@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        So willing to tell people how to live but I bet you don’t lift a finger to help them.

      • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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        1 year ago

        He will use the money to keep surviving.
        I’m all for giving to homeless helping non-profits though, like the ones which serves them food.

          • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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            1 year ago

            If he didn’t he would probably be already dead.
            I don’t think this conclusion is less likely than yours. It also has the advantage to not give up to pesimism.

              • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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                1 year ago

                If he wasn’t using his begged money to survive, he wouldn’t have been a beggar for a long time. Is that easier to understand?

                You think your personal opinion is reality but others’ aren’t? Maybe you should read your comment again to see how you didn’t either bring anything else than your personal view. Don’t expect replies to do better than you did.

                Between two personal opinions, I’d rather take the optimistic ones, because it has more chances to be helpful.

  • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    Them: don’t give money to the poor and destitute, they’ll just use it for drink and drugs!

    Me: what do you think I was going to use it for?

  • onion@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    Not everyone knows this but you can actually combine multiple notes to make a bigger purchase

    • Pyro@lemmy.world
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      No way, I’ve been looking for a £150,000 note for years so I can buy a house and you’re telling me I could have bought one by adding others together???

  • arthurpizza@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    If a gift of money comes with requirements on how to spend that money, it’s not a gift.

      • cvozbosher@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        Yes, gift cards are gift cards. Gift cards, however, are not money as you can’t spend them anywhere.

        • Pyro@lemmy.world
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          Gift cards are gift cards.

          Yes, but that wasn’t the question. Gift cards are to gifts like butterflies are to butter.

          • LemmyInRedditSux
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            1 year ago

            You can buy anything you want with a gift card. Whatever you choose to buy, that’s your gift. But no matter what you do, you’re never gonna get butter out of a butterfly.

            • Pyro@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              You can buy anything you want with a gift card.

              Only if that thing you want is sold by the shop the gift card is for. That’s the condition.

              The original point (above my comment) was that the presence of the condition makes it not a gift.

              I will literally buy you a $200 Roblox gift card if you can directly buy a Keychron Q6 with it.

              • Deuces@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                By that logic a Lego set isn’t a gift because the gift giver stipulated that the money could only be spent on a Lego set

                • Pyro@lemmy.world
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                  1 year ago

                  the money

                  What money? There is only a Lego set in your example. A Lego set does not pretend to be money like a gift card does.

                  If you were to pick one thing to take with you to a desert island for 6 months I guarantee a Lego set would be higher on your list than money. This is because Lego itself has value, at least to those who enjoy using it. Money does not have any intrinsic value outside trade. It is a means to an end. A way to acquire something of actual value to you.

    • Tier 1 Build-A-Bear 🧸@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Maybe I don’t feel like enabling a total stranger? Maybe I want to make sure I’m helping a problem with food and clothes rather than making it worse? Call it whatever the fuck you want Imma keep doing it and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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        1 year ago

        The best thing you can do is donate to food banks. Either with actual donations of food or money donations.

        It’s actually a good idea to give food banks money because they get no end of cookies but no fruit or vegetable.

        I volunteered a food bank occasionally and we have enough pasta to survive the apocalypse. And every week people bring us even more bloody pasta. We could probably give it people to build as a shelter for themselves and still have more than we knew what to do with.

        Also we have 40 bags of kale. Which I don’t think anyone wants to eat even if they are starving.

        • Sotuanduso
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          1 year ago

          But if you just offer to buy them food, then people on the internet will complain at you denying them agency.

            • Deuces@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              There’s people in this thread saying a gift card isn’t a gift because it has stipulations on how it can be spent. They’re not being super aggressive about it, but still. If you want to find that comment chain check my last post.

            • Sotuanduso
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              1 year ago

              I mentioned it on a Discord server and got such responses as “Oh shut up. Let people have agency.” and “It’s just restricting more control from societies most vulnerable group.”

  • Sagrotan@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Same story, but I turned around and gave him another 5 bucks with the words “oh, sorry, I know that stuff’s expensive, have a nice evening”

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    1 year ago

    You silly. He’s obviously gonna put your $5 into the stock market, wait for it to grow 1000x and then use that money to buy drugs.

    Funnily enough, that’s almost exactly what I did, except stock market = crypto.

  • kerrigan778@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Legitimately? Spend some time homeless in a US city and you will get fentanyl for free or next to nothing. I do not recommend it.

    • LemmyInRedditSux
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      I’m curious, why would that stuff be passed around for free? My first thought was conspiracy-theory like nefarious suppliers want to addict & ruin & eradicate the homeless population, and doing it via addictive pleasures would be an indirect innocuous-seeming way to do it. Watching the homeless population drop like flies: “THeY DiD iT tO tHeMsELvEs!”

      • sloppy_diffuser@sh.itjust.works
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        Its just super potent compared to other opioids/opiates using the same source material (opium). Its like 100x more potent than morphine and 50x heroin.

        If you were slinging heroin and have a lab to make the stuff you just increased your production rate by that multiplier.

        I’m sure there are some geopolitical PvP factors as the other commenter eluded to, but the economics of supply/demand were the enabler.

      • kerrigan778@lemmy.world
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        Honestly not sure, my stories on such come from a recently ex homeless addict coworker (food industry) I had last year. My understanding is it is just so cheap and plentiful that people will just offer you some pretty often.

        As for why fentanyl is fucking everywhere and dirt cheap, that’s a bit more complicated but has a lot to do with China.

        • driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br
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          1 year ago

          I think is just human nature solidarity and bonding. I have given my friends plenty of drugs, that I paid good money for them, for free, and they have also shared plenty of their drug with me.

  • Empricorn@feddit.nl
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    He’s not spending only the $5 on drugs! Responsibility means financing your hobbies with proper budgeting: it’s called Adulting.

    • Pyro@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      The original was fine. The OP confronted the homeless guy, so the word “him” works here.

    • TheKingBee@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      no you literally broke it. You’ve misunderstood the joke.

      The swerve is you think Nom here is going to confront the woman, but then he talks to the guy he gave money too.

      Why would he talk to her, she doesn’t know where to get $5 drugs.

      • ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Nah, car window washers.

        $2 per car, 4 cars per light change, 6 light changes an hour = about $50/hour.

        Edit: Since people need more help with math:

        1 light change: 6 minutes.

        Time to wash a car window: 30 seconds at most (20 seconds is normal)

        Lets call an additional 30 seconds between cars for moving 3 feet and getting money.

        That’s 1 minute per car. Out of a slow 6 cars per minute, doing ~24 cars per hour gives you plenty of time to account for resting and being turned down

        $100 an hour would be a good hour, $20 would be slow. $50/hr is a round average. Most work a couple hours a day.

        Yes, it’s illegal to walk in traffic like that.

        Edit edit: https://thewest.com.au/news/perth/a-16-year-old-perth-window-washer-reveals-what-life-is-like-on-the-roadside-ng-b881029234z

        $375/day, $150 in “a few hours”

        • prole@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Lol, right. Just like you can just ignore air resistance when doing your physics homework.

          We all know there’s just a line of hundreds of cars, everyday, waiting to willingly give $2 to a random homeless person to wash their windshield. Just all day, cars coming through and voluntarily giving up $2 for a service they don’t need BECAUSE THE CAR CAN DO IT ITSELF.

          What reality do you live in?

        • LemmyInRedditSux
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          1 year ago

          Sounds like estimation of a best case scenario. If I was in one of those cars I would definitely say “no.” I don’t even look at those median grifters. And if they did climb onto the hood of my vehicle and start washing my windshield without my consent, there would be hell for them to pay.

        • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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          Well in my area. It’s people that just sit at a traffic light. Maybe with a dog and people just give them a couple dollars when they pass by. There’s so many different individuals going through a light at a grocery store that everybody has the chance of giving them some money without feeling like they’re being imposed on. It’s a very lucrative racket in the right area.

          It’s a fantastic way to earn money if you have no morals or self-respect.

          • PopOfAfrica@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Doesn’t seem any different to me than standing their working as a retail cashier. You’re getting paid to destroy your feet. That’s the point.

            • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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              Yeah but the beggar is self-employed and can go home whenever he wants. He’s actually better off.

              I used to work in retail and I used to have to hang around in the same era of the store because it was my area of the store and they had one of those infomercial TV ad things in my aisle and it was on loop that repeated maybe every 30 seconds. That thing actually caused me mental anguish, it was like water torture listening to the same 30 second thing on a loop, for 8 hours a day.

              I used to go hid in the stockroom to get away from it.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                1 year ago

                I used to work at an arcade. Along with having to hear every machine go through its demo over and over again when no one was playing it, they also had a video tape on a hour loop. During Christmas, because the song just came out, I had to hear All I Want For Christmas Is You, every hour, 40 hours a week for a month and a half. I hate that song far more than most people who hate it.

                • Drusas@kbin.social
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                  1 year ago

                  As someone who used to regularly go to the gym, this is why I hate Shake it Off by Taylor Swift, and dislike her music in general. They played it about every half an hour. Spend an hour and a half at the gym, and you’d hear that song three times. Go to the gym three days a week, and it doesn’t take long to absolutely hate the sound of her voice.

        • PaupersSerenade@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          Money has no morals. The amount of money you have is probably the worst way to judge a character. More often it’s circumstances and I see no reason to kick someone when they’re down like you do.

          • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            I’m not big on relying on charity to pay my bills. If you could get it by doing an actual job and just beg because it’s easy you’re stealing from those who actually need it.

      • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        They aren’t doing it on their own either. They usually live with family, or families. Are also on assistance, and that 2009 Mercedes that they drove the lot over, is the family car, registered to their cousin. It’s not a glamorous life, like OP thinks.

    • ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      The downvotes from ignorance on Lemmy are simply astounding. People can’t believe things outside their tiny bubbles.

      Car window washing: $375/day, $150 in “a few hours” https://thewest.com.au/news/perth/a-16-year-old-perth-window-washer-reveals-what-life-is-like-on-the-roadside-ng-b881029234z

      Begging: $400/day https://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-07-15/professional-beggars-intimidate-women-tourists-melbourne/6621824

      Begging, $40 before lunch, then went to work: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/164e6f/comment/c7sm5b5/ (the whole thread is really good, fantastic content in this post. There’s a link to a blog where guy begged in different ways, and logged the results. Worst: “ex-wife” ($3.30/hr), best: “wheelchair” ($23/hr))

      For 38 studies, $20usd-$60usd/day: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/10575677211036498 - which is what most people are thinking about.