I think utilitarianism is too diverse to just put EA in that box and therefore say its bad. I agree that it could be used as a cover, but for most people it just means finding the best way to help with their limited resources. I agree that it probably wont make systematic changes, but that requires a level of capital that is unavailable for the average person anyway, who can probably make a more significant change in this regard using their voice and vote, while directing their modest resources to where it can already make significant improvement.
Yes, its really frustrating to see how we have been led into a culture war. And of course when they attack minorities we have to push back, but at the same time there are so much more important issues heavily affecting everyone, including minorities. Hope there will be some day when taxing corporations is just as hot topic as whether trans people should sport nowadays.