• Semi-Hemi-Lemmygod@lemmy.worldEnglish
    51·
    23 days ago

    I feel like I’d act like him if I were president. I don’t want this job, so I’m not gonna do this job. You all are fucked and I want to go home.

    Which is why I will never run for office, though I’m sure that I’ll be forced to do it like he was.

    Fuck.

    • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOPMEnglish
      11·
      23 days ago

      Hello Emperor Tiberius.

      spoiler

      doesn’t want the job of Emperor-heir

      Emperor Augustus says fine, fuck you, I won’t give you the job

      happy for a few years

      Augustus comes back, says “Everyone else died, I need you to take the job”

      plead not to get the job

      Augustus forces you to divorce your wife who you love and take the job anyway

      become Emperor when Augustus dies

      immediately plead for the Senate to take up its ancient prerogatives and rule

      Senate refuses because they’ve all been replaced with lazy bootlicking bastards by Augustus before you came into power

      spend a few years being a miserable and sad bastard but doing your job competently

      finally get sick of it and retire to an island with near-zero communication with the outside world, because fuck everyone else

      word gets to you that the guy you left in charge is just slaughtering people in preparation for a coup

      go back to Rome reluctantly

      execute a bunch of the stupid bastards who let it happen

      die miserable, just as you lived

      • Semi-Hemi-Lemmygod@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        23 days ago

        execute a bunch of the stupid bastards who let it happen

        die miserable, just as you lived

        Yeah that sounds like the end of my term of office.