Almost every asshole I’ve met thinks they’re aren’t an asshole. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but whoever they are will think it doesn’t apply to them. 🤣
How to avoid the friend zone
Eh, I am an asshole.
Friends are hard to make. It’s even harder to find good friends. The key is to move through life open to the possibilities as they come.
Given enough time, and the willingness to be a friend, regardless of whether or not it works out at any given time, you’ll find people. Might take years, might get lucky at any time.
No bullshit, the real secret to having friends is being one. You’ll meet people at work, at stores, at events, wherever. If you comport yourself as the kind of person you would like to have as a friend, it is inevitable that you’ll meet someone that wants that kind of friend too. From there, you do your best, and let them do their best, and see where it goes.
It can be harder the more unusual you’re desired friend traits are. But that’s not the point.
It’s okay to “fake it til you make it”, btw. If you want a friend that’s compassionate, but you’re more of a stiff individual that isn’t moved by others, you might need to learn compassion by faking it. But as long as you’re acting with compassion, you’ll eventually either learn it for real, or become so good at mimicking compassion that it becomes the same thing. And that’s true for almost any trait. Hard to fake raw intelligence, or being tall, but stuff that’s behavioral? Absolutely possible to pick it up as you go along.
Be the kind of person you want in your life
I was mostly joking with my title. I don’t know if I’m an asshole. I do possess asshole like traits. I’m deeply against any type of conservatism. Interacting with people drains my energy so I can be glib after a while of hanging out. I’m probably just as sensitive as I am insensitive at times too so I spend a lot of time ruminating things that shouldn’t be taken as an offense.
I think in the long run it’s just difficult for me to establish a friend because I’m not sure what I want out of the relationship other than just having someone around to shoot the shit with. That means I need to have an interesting take on things but I’m not that interesting.
I think friendships are a give and take and I over give when it’s not necessary while also being absent when it’s most important. I also dont take ever. Thinking I must be self sufficient in all things.
I don’t know. I should probably do better.
You don’t sound like an asshole. You sound like a really well adjusted person.
Incels complain about being put in the “friend zone”, so infrels must be one layer below them?
Okay, but it is really tough to go from acquaintance to friend, so I can see complaining about it.
At the same time though, I think most people have had the experience of someone trying to be closer than you want to be as friends, so it’s probably easier to have empathy, which I think is the biggest problem with incels.
Do you wanna be friends OP?
No, why would you want to be friends with a loser like me? That must mean you’re a bigger loser. I wont be friends with losers.
Do you wanna build a snowman?
Do you wanna talk for hours?
