• fitgse@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    When my grandmother met my now wife, who is from Alabama, my grandmother told her “well, we all have to be from somewhere”

    • krazylink@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      As someone who’s family is from Alabama, I hard agree with your grandma. Where was she from? And can I steal her line?

      • fitgse@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        My grandma was from the Midwest, mostly South Dakota. My grandma was very sweet and so it really cracked us up when she said that.

    • typo@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      That to me sounds like a very northern state phrase. I can absolutely hear my grandma saying that (not saying you/they are, just made me smile thinking of that)

  • lowcarbbq
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    1 year ago

    “Better an empty house, than a bad tenant” after every loud fart.

    • harlatan@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      i use a very similar one, in german we say: everything that doesn’t pay rent gets thrown out

    • Piecemakers@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Now, that’s wisdom I can get behind! 🤙🏼 (raised out yonder in the mitten, now happily left coast rooted)

  • Mr PoopyButthole
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    1 year ago

    “How are you ever gonna keep a job if you can’t keep juice in a cup?!”

    I was 9 years old

  • demonquark@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    My grandmother used to say: if you expect your good deed to be reciprocated, you’re not actually doing a good deed.

    She said it in dutch, so I hope it’s an decent translation.

    • Hexarei@programming.dev
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      1 year ago

      I’ve heard this one put similarly: “If you’re looking for something in return, even your good deeds are an extension of your selfishness.”

  • BallShapedMan@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My grandma would say “he can put his boots at the foot of my bed.” My grandma had the hots for lots of younger country singers.

  • Aryuproudomenowdaddy [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    I don’t know about ‘iconic’ but I once heard my grandpa say “I’d eat 5 feet of her shit just to see where it came from.” and that mental scar will probably stay with me the rest of my life.

  • 108beads
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    1 year ago

    From my grandmother: “Essen! Essen!” (Eat! Eat!) Followed quickly by “You need to lose weight! You’re getting fat!”

  • Fondots@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    From my mom, not my grandparents, but we’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of this one

    “If I find it, can I hit you with it?”

    Used when we were bugging her about not being able to find something. Don’t believe she ever made good on that threat, but it usually did it’s intended purpose of getting us to quit bugging her and find it ourselves. And if it was something we really needed help finding it would have been an acceptable trade-off.

    My sister got a lot of use out of it with her college roommates and my wife and I use it with each other pretty regularly.

  • jaamesbaxterr@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My grandpa had a million one liners, most were somewhat inappropriate but here’s a fun one. He’d say, “Did anyone get hurt in that wreck?” To any of my friends that drove over. When they inevitably asked “what wreck?” He’d say, “the one you pulled up in.” This was devastating to the ones who were super proud of their cars. Lol

  • Venicon@sopuli.xyz
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    1 year ago

    ‘Whits fur ye will no’ go past ye’ - what’s for you will not go past you

    My wee Scottish granny had some real wisdom.

    ‘No point in worrying about somethin cos if it happens ye suffer twice!’

  • Random Dent@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    When he was talking about turning 100: “I can’t see, and I can’t hear, but I can still eat so I’m not going to die.”

    He did indeed make it to 100.

  • ragica@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Friend’s grandfather used to say…

    The hurrier I go the behinder I get.

    • quicksand@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I love this, I’m gonna have to start using it when everyone is rushing and making silly mistakes at work

  • Nusm@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My grandmother: “You can get glad in the same pants that you got mad in.”

    Also, when you’re hurt: “it’ll feel better when it quits hurting.”

  • Wodge@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Anything bad happens:

    My grandad: “FLAMING JACKSAWS AND BUCKETS OF BLOOD!”

    He was never in a metal band that I’m aware of.