• erp@lemmy.world
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    5 months ago

    This, ladies, gentlemen, & all other variadic param[] of polymorphic gender identifier: average is just about useless when your income distribution is skewed to hell.

    The following elaboration of ‘skewed to hell’ brought to you by our grammatical sponsor(s) who felt a single sentence would be asking a bit much:

    • skewed to hell:
    • much like a contemporary Big Box Home Improvement™ 2x4,
    • even after you have laboriously picked through the entire 2 pallets of this week’s pathetic delivery of stock,
    • each one weighing as much as an Olympic bar (~45 pounds for the metric challenged),
    • overladen with pumped-up moisture content,
    • with employees giving you the stink-eye because their boss is the assistant viceroy to the vice-supervisor II who reports ‘directly’ to the district junior manager of "end-cap yo’ ass from on high I crave the retail facing’,
    • trying in vain to select the most choice and optimal specimens,
    • still ending up not being able to see anything but sap, knots, and disappointment as you look down the length,
    • as you strain to assess its deviation from a long-lost baseline against the fluorescent lights,
    • activating your ADHD superpowers,
    • contemplating economic and environmental policy failures of multiple decades,
    • questioning your life choices,
    • ultimately defending a clumsy attack on your sensibilities by the special human who parked blocking the store entrance and hotdog stand because it can’t be arsed to use a parking spot and would not be qualified to park in the ‘pro contractor’ area anyway as judged by peers

    Regardless, the income distribution is about as normal, perky, and bell-shaped as a Petunia in Death Valley.

    Note: 2x4 is given in nominal measurements, not actual dimensions - do your research

    • force@lemmy.world
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      5 months ago

      ADHD superpowers? My ADHD superpower is staying up (against my will) for 2 days straight half-alive before an important event, but not being able to stay awake past 3 pm when I need to be somewhere at 5 pm. And any amount of sleep/napping below 7 hours somehow making me more tired than I was before