I feel like we have some fundamental value differences so when I find someone who’s like me, I get really happy.
How do I find them?
In hostels 99% of people are actively into drinking
Find a local AA meeting
Go to the spiritual / meditation / yoga events. Also anything health related like workouts and such, juice bars, etc. Then cultural events.
Stay out of hostels!!!
I don’t drink alcohol and have the same problem finding people who don’t. I usually end up going everywhere by myself
It depends if you’re looking to meet locals or other travelers/nomads.
If locals, you go to the same activities you would in your home country - rock climbing, social dancing, chess club, knitting circle, volunteer organizations, whatever aligns with your actual interests. For example, I’ve been to climbing gyms in more than a dozen countries. I always meet people, and sometimes we end up climbing together again, or they extend an invite to join an outdoor trip somewhere.
If you want to meet travelers, though, it’s pretty easy: you just sign up for tours - walking tours, day tours, museum tours, etc. Almost every major city in the world has a “free walking tours” available, where you spend a few hours walking the city and tip out your guide - afterwards, it’s pretty common to grab lunch or coffee with others from the group you just met. I remember taking day tours out of Bangkok - they drive you to waterfalls, hot springs, an elephant park, etc. and by the end of the day, you’ve met all the other people on the tour, and you make plans for dinner or some other activity the next day.
Stay in non-party hostels or digital nomad places such as colivings. Basically, look for slightly older people.
A lot of people aren’t drinking anymore
I spend <10 hours a week working. My focus right now is meeting many people to find the ones I want to have in my life. I will work more after that part of my life feels great.
Can I ask how you’re able to work so little and spend that time on that part of your life? That would be amazing but life is typically expensive so how do you do that?? Definitely a goal lol
I have met some people who just go to local AA meetings, as its all over the world and most are super friendly and sometimes also have like more meetups and activities…
I am not a recovering alcoholic, so I can easily be around people who drink, I just hate being around wasted people. This advice is based on Europe. I prefer to bond over activities:
If I see someone playing chess on their phone, I ask if they want to play on my board instead? In general having one good two player game on you, is always a good idea. Even lbackgammon or something more luckbased.
In hostels: breakfasts are great, because its the beginning of the day, and then if I like someone, I ask if they want to join me for my plans?
I join source and find local volleyball amateur players. It is both to stay active, but it is also great to meet people and often you’ll end up hanging out afterwards.
Hiking, alltough a bit tricky as it rarely happens. But if I do meet people on long hikes in the mountains, I tend to chat with them and give them my number.
Dancing. Like again depends on where I am and what is available, but most salsa and locla folkdancing events, people usually dont get wasted. Also I like techno and although most do drugs, I find it much more pleassant and fun to be with and dance to, also sober.
Live radio cafés… some places in Europe have these live radio channels, with a café vibe. Its a chill vibe and pretty cool.
Free lectures and exhibitions. Many artists show there art for free with a nice crowd. Often there are different university/EU projects/workshops or lectures for free. Obviously a bit more easy to meet likeminded people, when the topic are quite specific.
Not sure if this has been said yet but, download the ‘Meetup’ app. You can set it to whatever city you’re currently in. You will find an abundance of groups that do all sort of activities that don’t involve drinking. Some are free, some require a small fee to join (depending on the activity they’re doing on a specific date), but it’s a great way to meet locals and international travelers alike.
As an alternative to “don’t stay at hostels”, I’d say “stay at more mature/family oriented hostels”.
I’ve done a few hostels here and there - YHA was a no party, chill vibe hostel. Sure, there were young people who probably ventured out at night, but 50-70% of patrons were older (mid 20s-mid 30s, some even older) or families.
Generator on the other hand was basement bar, constant doof doof.
Im sure other people have mentioned it, but you are going about it wrong, imo.
You shouldn’t strive to meet people based on what they don’t do. I personally don’t drink, mostly just because I find alcohol tastes bad, but that is not even remotely an interesting character trait about me.
Look for people who do the things that you do. Or, even more pertinently, just find things to do and you will meet people while you do them.
Wait outside of an AA meeting.
Hostel? Of course you’ll find drinkers there.
come find me 😅☺️