My cooking rules:
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Don’t
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eat ingredients out of their packages instead
Mmmmm… raw chicken… 🤤
Delicious salmonella
I think you mean chickenella. We weren’t talking about salmon, sir.
Of course, you’re right - my apologies. It must be the chickenella.
Chickenella: the story of Cinderella’s unfortunate sister
Not very popular at dinner parties though.
(pouring salt and chili peppers down my throats)
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What if I’ve got a perfectly smoked butt that’s just begging to be shredded?
I’ll be right over!
Fair. That’s how the majority of food borne illnesses occurs.
What if it’s a turkey?
Don’t put your hands in your butt.
Oh… Um…
how to remove stuffing from own butt
Get one cup. And two girls.
Instructions unclear. Got a jar instead.
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Oh. Yeah
You can stick the turkey in your butt, just as long as you don’t put your hands in there.
I think you better ask about the rest of his rules
It is now!